resources
We have compiled two sets of resources:
Resources for Teachers - The first is aimed for small group work led by a teacher or teaching assistant for an offer of extra time, space and support for a bereaved child or children.
Resources for Schools - The second set of resources are for all members of staff to gain a broader understanding of supporting bereaved children in schools, especially in those days of early bereavement.
RESOurces FOR TEACHERS
The following books are suitable for use in assemblies, in classes and for small group as well as one-to-one support and for recommending to families.
Each can be bought and given or read to the child but we have also developed guided activity plans around each book to encourage healthy dialogue with the children around the themes of love, loss, death and grieving.
THE INVISIBLE STRING
Parents, educators, therapists, and social workers alike have declared The Invisible String the perfect tool for coping with all kinds of separation anxiety, loss, and grief. In this relatable and reassuring contemporary classic, a mother tells her two children that they're all connected by an invisible string.
Age Range - all primary school ages
Emma Says - This is an excellent book to use with bereaved children celebrating the continued connection they can have with their special person.
THE HEART AND THE BOTTLE
Award-winning picture book star Oliver Jeffers explores themes of love and loss in this life-affirming and uplifting tale.
Once there was a girl whose life was filled with wonder at the world around her…
Then one day something happened that made the girl take her heart and put it in a safe place. However, after that it seemed that the world was emptier than before. But would she know how to get her heart back?
Age Range - Key Stage 2
Emma Says - This is a heart warming book to share with bereaved children. Oliver Jeffers gently explores why someone may ‘bottle up’ their feelings after the death of a special person. He guides us through his main character, to learn that instead of bottling up our feelings, we should keep noticing all the curiosities of the world and the things in life which we enjoyed before they died.
THE MEMORY TREE
Fox has lived a long and happy life in the forest, but now he is tired. He lies down in his favourite clearing, and falls asleep for ever. Before long, Fox's friends begin to gather in the clearing. One by one, they tell stories of the special moments that they shared with Fox. And so, as they share their memories, a tree begins to grow, becoming bigger and stronger with each memory, sheltering and protecting all the animals in the forest, just as Fox did when he was alive.
Age Range - all primary school ages
Emma Says - This gorgeous picture book focuses on the ongoing model of loss where the bereaved child can have a continuing relationship with their deceased loved one. By telling stories and remembering special as well as everyday moments, the memory of our special person is kept alive.
THe River
Rowan loves the river; it’s just like he is. On some days, it’s quiet and calm, on others it’s light and playful, and then there are the days when it roars along, wild and angry. But when Rowan goes through a particularly difficult winter, the river freezes – just like Rowan. Can Rowan find a way to release his frozen feelings, and allow the river to flow freely once more?
Age Range - Year 2 and Key Stage 2
Emma Says - This beautiful picture book shows us that our feelings flow and change in life, just like a river. The river freezes when Rowan’s beloved dog dies, and we see the river freeze for a long time. It’s only when Rowan saves an injured bird that we see his feelings like the river, begin to thaw and flow freely once more. By the end of the book, Rowan realises that one thing is certain, “The river is always changing. Just like Rowan.”
Tilda TRiES AGAIN
Tilda's world is just as she likes it . . . until one day, it turns completely UPSIDE DOWN. All of a sudden, everything is topsy-turvy, and nothing feels right. Things that were once easy now seem incredibly challenging. Can Tilda discover a new way to approach her problems and believe in herself? Bold, bright and empowering, this is an inspiring story about coping with difficult situations. It's the ideal book for helping children to build resilience and embrace a 'can do' approach to life.
Age Range - Key Stage 1 and Lower Key Stage 2
Emma Says - Bereaved children will quickly work out that the reason Tilda’s world has been turned upside down is because her dad has died. It’s not explicitly revealed that this is the case but it’s the reason why this book is so good to use with bereaved children. They will see many parallels in Tilda’s experiences to their own whether you are using this book with a child in the days of their early bereavement or further on as they build their world around their grief and experience.
the sea saw
When Sofia loses her beloved teddy after a day at the beach, she is heartbroken. But the sea saw it all, and maybe, just maybe, it can bring Sofia and her teddy back together. However long it may take...
Age Range - all primary school ages
Emma Says - This is a brilliant story which shows that “nothing is ever truly lost if you keep it in your heart.” The author illustrator explores Sofia’s grief sensitively as his illustrations reveal to those who really look, that the bear originally belonged to Sofia’s absent mother.
when sadness comes to call
When Sadness arrives, try not to be afraid: give it a name, listen to it and spend some time together. Maybe all it wants is to know that it’s welcome. This beautiful debut by author-illustrator talent Eva Eland takes a poignant but uplifting look at dealing with sadness.
Age Range - Key Stage 1 and Lower Key Stage 2
Emma Says - This is a gorgeous book to help children learn to accept how they feel when they’re sad. The author-illustrator doesn’t explain why the main character is sad and she doesn’t have to - it’s not the point, for bereaved children the point is that death IS sad and it’s ok to FEEL sad, to sit with your feelings and know that it’s ok. There are some lovely creative ideas in this book to help children think of things they can do to look after themselves when they are feeling overwhelmed by sadness.
michael Rosen’s SAD BOOK
Very occasionally the term non-fiction has to stretch itself to accommodate a book that fits into no category at all. Michael Rosen's Sad Book is such a book. It chronicles Michael's grief at the death of his son Eddie from meningitis at the age of 19. A moving combination of sincerity and simplicity, it acknowledges that sadness is not always avoidable or reasonable and perfects the art of making complicated feelings plain.
Age Range - Upper Key Stage 2
Emma Says - Michael Rosen is brilliant. He pours his personal experience of grief into this book and creates a gift for all children, not just those who are bereaved. But it’s not a comfortable read and children will need supporting if they choose to look at it. Bereaved children though will take encouragement from how Rosen expresses his feelings and how he swings between extreme feelings of sadness and loss to the hilarity of how ridiculous and silly grief can make us behave when we feel so completely overwhelmed by it. My own children laughed out loud when I shared this book with them and it was both the comfort and relief we needed at such a impossibly sad time after their daddy had died.
DEATH: I MISS YOU
This reassuring picture book explores the difficult issue of death for young children. Children's feelings and questions about this sensitive subject are looked at in a simple but realistic way. This book helps them to understand their loss and come to terms with it.
Age Range - Early Years and Key Stage 1
Emma Says - This is a very clear first look at death for young children. The author starts by stating that, “Death is a normal part of life. All living things grow, change and eventually die. When someone dies their body stops working - they stop breathing and their heart stops beating. They can’t think or feel any more. They don’t eat or sleep.” It’s a direct introduction to a caring and supportive book very well aimed for it’s young readership. There’s questions included in the book and it can be used to support many conversations around grief and loss with a young bereaved child.
GOODBYE MOUSIE
One morning a boy finds that his pet, Mousie, won't wake up. The truth is Mousie has died. At first the boy doesn't believe it. He gets very mad at Mousie for dying, and then he feels very sad. But talking about Mousie, burying Mousie in a special box, and saying good-bye helps this boy begin to feel better about the loss of his beloved pet.
Age Range - Early Years and Year 1
Emma Says -
Why do things die?
A beautiful and gentle look at the circle of life, using Christine Pym's gorgeous animals characters to explore the emotions and facts around death, with questions such as Is it ok to talk about dying? What happens when someone dies? Can I shout and cry and hide away? and How can I stop feeling sad?.
Age Range - Early Years and Key Stage 1
Emma Says -
WHEN DINOSAURS DIE
Straightforward and comprehensive, this indispensable book is a comforting aid to help young kids and families through a difficult time in their lives. No one can really understand death, but to children, the passing away of a loved one can be especially perplexing and troublesome.
Age Range - Early Years and Key Stage 1
Emma Says -
NO MATTER WHAT
No matter what?' Small asks. But what if he turns into a bug, or a crocodile, or even a grizzly bear? Small has all sorts of questions about love, and his mummy must reassure him that her love will never, ever run out - no matter what.
Age Range - Early Years and Year 1
Emma Says -
GOODBYE MOG
Mog was tired. She was dead tired… Mog thought, ‘I want to sleep for ever.’ And so she did. But a little bit of her stayed awake to see what would happen next. Join the Thomas family as they say goodbye to their dear pet Mog, and get a new kitten. It could all be a disaster, but Mog is still there to help…
Age Range - Key Stage 1 and Year 3
Emma Says -
badger’s parting gifts
Badger is so old that he knows he must soon die, so he does his best to prepare his friends. When he finally passes away, they are grief-stricken, but one by one they remember the special things he taught them during his life. By sharing their memories, they realise that although Badger is no longer with them physically, he lives on through his friends.
Age Range - Key Stage 1
Emma Says -
waiting for wolf
A beautiful and moving picture book about learning to carry on after the death of a loved one, stunningly illustrated by an outstanding new picture book talent. Perfect for sharing, it will bring comfort to both children and parents.
Age Range - Key Stage 2
Emma Says -
WATERBUGS and DRAGONFLIES
Doris Stickney tells the story of a small colony of water bugs living below the surface of a pond. Whenever a bug leaves the pond, those left behind are faced with the mystery of their absence. Stickney invites children into the question of their absence and offers hope for the future.
Age Range - Lower Key Stage 2
Emma Says -
Wherever you are my love will find you
Love is the greatest gift we have to give our children. It's the one thing they can carry with them each and every day. If love could take shape it might look something like these heartfelt words and images from the inimitable Nancy Tillman. Wherever You Are My Love Will Find You is a book to share with your loved ones, no matter how near or far, young or old, they are.
Age Range - all primary school ages
Emma Says -
HOW TO MEND A FRIEND
Some friends need a great big hug to make them feel well. Some prefer to be alone. Some listen, others tell the most adventurous stories of the times that went before! Some friends may not want to talk about them anymore. How to Mend a Friend is a heartfelt picture book which touches on empathy, loss and friendship.
Age Range - Key Stage 2
Emma Says -
RESOurces FOR SCHOOLS
INSET TRAINING
We offer a three part School Inset programme to reassure and empower your staff to know what to do when you have a child bereaved of a significant family member in school.
The Little Book of Bereavement for Schools
The Little Book of Bereavement for Schools is written by best-selling author Ian Gilbert together with his three children. It is a very personal account of the way educational institutions tried and succeeded, tried and failed and sometimes didn’t try at all to help William, Olivia and Phoebe come to terms with the death of their mother.
Emma says - This is the book I wish I’d written! It is full of good ideas and advice for schools, especially in the early days of a family’s bereavement. It doesn’t take long to read so worth having in the staff room for all members of staff to access.
Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine
Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine offers practical and sensitive support for bereaved children. Beautifully illustrated, it suggests a helpful series of activities and exercises accompanied by the friendly characters of Bee and Bear. This book offers a structure and an outlet for the many difficult feelings which inevitably follow when someone dies.
Age range - all primary school ages
Emma says - This is a great book to take ideas from for supporting a bereaved child in school. It starts with getting to know the child, their family and the person who has died, then moves on to activities which explore our feelings and finally to creative ways to remember them.
I Can… You CAn…
Support cards from the Childhood Bereavement Network.
An innovative set of four postcards for children and young people bereaved of someone special to share with other important people in their lives. The cards can be used by bereaved children and young people to alert their parent or carer, friend or teacher how they can help through this difficult time, and to remind themselves of coping strategies. Each card lists various ways to help, suggested by other young people who have been through similar experiences. The child can indicate which ideas they prefer or are particularly relevant. Cards come in packs of 100 (25 sets of four designs: to my parents/carers, to my teacher, to my friend and to myself).
Emma says - A worthwhile resource which can be adapted to suit the needs of individual children. The ideas to help a teacher support a bereaved child are especially valuable to have in school and will help guide that initial conversation between school and the bereaved family to make sure school meets the needs of the bereaved child from the very beginning.